PicMonkey Hits the Streets with Huge-o New Product!
PicMonkey.com is proud-to-the-point-of-bursting to announce our newest product: PicMonkey Glass. These software-enabled glasses let you perform stunning visual edits on the world around you, totally hands-free. Orton, Cross Process, Touch Up — all the effects you know and love on PicMonkey.com — can be applied to the lens of PicMonkey Glass, using voice commands, while wearing the glasses. Our beta testers reported a happier outlook, greater tolerance in visually challenging circumstances, and an increased ability to accept spousal unsightliness.
See the product demo at www.picmonkey.com/glass
PicMonkey Glass uses 3D movie technology to make photo editing effects available to the naked eye. As light rays pass through the red and blue lenses of the glasses, a detailed point cloud of the world is uploaded to an armada of servers, where sophisticated object recognition algorithms break apart light fields into diffuse parametric isolations. Finally, a dedicated Higgs boson emitter attached to the eyepiece re-combines an ultra high resolution retinal projection, at a rate of 1,000 Hz, and neutered nanobots squeegee off residual ionic schvitz.